01:15Pm
30/10/2022
Relationship Without Attraction-Can It Last?
Can a relationship last without attraction?
There are many factors that can affect a relationship and one begins to distance himself from the other believing that they are simply not attracted to each other anymore. Being attracted to our partner is not a state that cannot change over time due to some circumstances. As we well know, attraction also contains emotion, so it is affected, has ups and downs, can come back. But there are also cases when he is no longer attracted to us or we are not attracted to him.
Many believe that attraction from the side of a man and from the side of a woman, has differences. Some of them we can perceive easily, as for example, if we observe a little how a man can feel attracted to a woman and vice versa. Perhaps the feelings, the way of thinking, and even the criteria of one and the other play their role.
Relationship without attraction-Factors that can affect it
Below we will take a look at the factors that can affect the relationship to such an extent that it seems that there is no longer attraction either from one side or from the other, even from both at the same time as well as withdrawal.
1) Habit
The habit that comes with time in a couple, seems to affect the relationship to some extent. This does not mean that in all relationships the habit, which is something inevitable with time, will have negative results such as for example no longer having attraction. Just really, in some cases the habit is a factor that makes the couple start to feel a "pulled" intimacy, so to speak, which stands in the way of romantic attraction.
In this case, the way we handle the expected habit will play a big role. Habit in itself does not prevent romantic interest, but that we become comfortable with this habit by taking our relationship for granted and putting it second to security. In this way, the attraction decreases and some other feelings and a different attitude take over, which can complicate the situation and create a strange atmosphere in the relationship.
2) Behavior
Changing behavior is a factor that, as you understand, can create strange thoughts and alienation from each other. When we notice changes in our partner's behavior, like for example he doesn't approach us as much as before or he doesn't notice any changes we might make in our appearance, while before this didn't happen then we start to think that maybe he's not that interested anymore and we create defenses. These defenses are usually seen in our own withdrawal until we realize what is really going on, in walls we may erect in communication with him, and the like.
In a relationship in which there is no attraction over time, we notice that there are usually also large changes in the behavior of the people involved in it. It does not necessarily mean that the couple often clashes or cannot get along in general. Most of the time what we see is a relationship that has somehow lost its way and has come to the point of looking like a "sibling relationship". That is, there is no romantic element.
3) Obligations
Most of us agree that the fast pace and many obligations can absorb us so much in everyday life, that we distance ourselves from the people who are next to us, without realizing it. So in some relationships we notice that the attraction is lost simply because there is no time to really deal with each other. Somes argue thats "whats you leave, leave you"! So also in this case the attraction is not something that because it exists in the first interval it will continue to exist by itself and over time. It needs work from both to be maintained over time.
The obligations, therefore, in our daily life can reduce the attraction we felt or we ourselves may be unaware that it still exists. When obligations become a priority and of course never end, we notice a reduction in human contact even among people who live together. So we would say that it is rightly another factor that can affect the attraction in a relationship..
4) Appearance change
A much-discussed factor is the changes in the appearance of either the man or the woman during the relationship. Of course, we find something like this in long-term relationships. It is a conversation we often hear in "wells" of men and women. Otherwise I would have met him/her and it is different now! Neglected himself/herself! Of course, we don't mean the changes brought about by time, but the case where we take our relationship for granted and in fact it seems that we don't take care of ourselves anymore, so we didn't take care of it so that we first feel good about it.
A confusion can arise on this matter. So before you think that in the course of a relationship we get to know our partner and love what he is, i.e. his mental world, we would like to emphasize that we are all in agreement on this! Changing appearance can be a factor that affects attraction in a relationship but from a different perspective. That is, when we get to know a person, we first like what we see in appearance. Then we either love his other gifts or fall away.
However, the romantic attraction that we feel, which we want to maintain over time, consists of both elements, for better or for worse. That is, we are attracted by the inner beauty of the person we are with and which he emits and combines with his outer beauty which is unique to us. Without wanting to misunderstand anything from the above, we are not saying that only the external appearance counts, but that combined both seem to maintain the couple's attraction for a much longer period of time. In any case, we know that it is very beautiful to take care of ourselves in order to feel confident, in a better mood and also for the person we have next to us. So we like it when we see the same from the other person.
Usually in these cases we hear the person complaining that his/her partner is indifferent and even considers that he/she has the relationship for granted and for this reason does not concern himself/herself with his/her appearance. As you understand, the person who will notice something like this, does not mean that it is only about the external appearance, but considers that there is a deeper cause that leads to this situation.
5) Lack of imagination and renewal
A factor that we mention more from a practical point of view, which can affect the attraction of the couple in the relationship as time goes by, is the lack of imagination and the necessary renewal. After a period of time, if we don't use a little imagination, small surprises and other ways of renewal, we notice that our relationship declines. This results in us beginning to believe that the attraction that existed has been lost.
But perhaps this has nothing to do with what is really happening. So it would be good in this case to test it a bit to get a clearer picture. It may be that what is currently missing from our relationship and makes us feel that there is no attraction, is simply its renewal.
6) Third party involvement
It is certainly an uncomfortable and soul-destroying situation, but we cannot avoid mentioning it since this case is also possible. When, either from the woman's side or from the man's side, there is a third person involved then it is very likely that the attraction between the couple will cease to exist. The interest turns somewhere else, so it diminishes and even disappears from the already existing relationship.
One difference that is observed in this case, is that this happens more often when the third person is from the woman's side. Some argue that women, when another man appears in their lives, completely monopolizes their interest, but this is not the case with men. Be that as it may, the involvement of a third person is certainly a factor that sometimes less and sometimes more, affects the attraction that a couple felt before. Of course, there is also the case that it is not a factor but a result. That is, perhaps the attraction has been lost so a space has been found for the third person to be involved.
7) Termination of relationship
Finally, we left the case that there really is no longer any attraction between the couple because the relationship has already ended within them. The hard part in this situation is that they don't want to admit it and keep this relationship for many other reasons. Some couples stay conventional in a relationship without attraction and just get on with it. Essentially, they know that the relationship has come to an end but they may not even be able to admit that they are no longer attracted to each other..
Can you be in a relationship without being attracted?
Taking a look above, we find that there are not a few factors that can affect a relationship and change the data regarding the attraction that has initially been created in the couple. Other times we realize it quickly and try to do something about it especially if one of the factors is routine, lack of renewal, fast pace in everyday life, even a strong change in appearance.
But there are also factors that will hardly reverse such a situation and will make people change their minds. Like, for example, if third parties are involved or if the relationship has already ended. Of course, it has been observed in some cases that the appearance of a third person became an occasion for one of the two to finally see that he/she is still attracted to the partner he/she already has. But can this happen to both of them to find their balance again?
As a conclusion, we would say that everything is not black or white! Under certain conditions, something can become manageable or even turn the situation around in a way that perhaps we hadn't thought of until that moment. It is important to always observe in the relationship exactly what is happening and not be blinded.......
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